I vividly
remember the
Guru Poornima of
1972. My beloved
Mother Sai had
chosen that day
to baptize all
of us and take
us under Her
loving care so
quietly that
none of us had
any inkling of
the great change
that was to come
into our lives!
At that time, I
was going
through a
terrible phase
in my life - my
biological
mother was
counting her
last days.
She was in the
final stage of
cancer and was
living on a diet
of one or two
teaspoons of
water or juice,
and continuous
namasmarana
(chanting of the
Divine name) all
day long. She
was the
principal of a
teachers’
training centre
and was working
in spite of her
illness. Every
evening, after
my husband
returned from
his office, we
used to visit my
mother. We spent
the whole
evening with
her, talking,
singing and
joking, to fill
her last few
days with joy.
My mother’s last
wish was to come
to Puttaparthi
and have Swami’s
darshan.
Her doctor had
refused to give
her permission
to travel and my
father agreed
with him. We, my
two brothers and
two sisters,
were with her,
so we tried to
cajole our
father into
accompanying her
to Puttaparthi.
He did not
believe in
either Sathya
Sai Baba or
Shirdi Sai Baba.
Therefore, he
was very
reluctant, but
under pressure
from us and
other Sai
devotees from
Kota, Rajasthan
(where we lived
at that time),
he agreed. We
used to pray to
Sri Shirdi Sai,
but had come to
know of Swami a
short while ago
from Sai
devotees of
Kota. The
devotees there
conducted
bhajans and
did seva
regularly.
Divine
Light in the
Night
On a very hot
summer night in
June, my mother
was very
restless and
could not sleep.
She suddenly saw
Swami in His
typical bright
orange robe
entering the
bedroom from the
door near which
my father’s bed
was placed.
Swami came near
her bed, put His
hand on her head
and talked to
her for a long
time, caressing
her forehead all
the while.
Mother asked Him
many questions
and He replied,
sometimes in the
affirmative,
mostly in the
negative.
My father was
watching this
drama from
barely eight
feet away,
wondering what
was happening
and who that
person in the
orange robe was!
When Swami
walked out of
the room His
robe touched my
father’s bed.
Even in the dark
room my father
noticed the halo
of hair, but
Swami’s face was
blurred; he
couldn’t observe
any of the
features.
My father was
sure that it was
some weird dream
and went to
sleep.
When we went to
meet my mother,
the day after
this vision, she
told us all
about Swami and
wished to have
His darshan.
She was hundred
percent sure
that she would
reach
Puttaparthi and
have darshan,
and only after
that breathe her
last. My father,
on the other
hand, had other
ideas. However,
after heated
arguments with
him followed by
my husband
allowing me to
accompany her,
my father agreed
for the journey
and booked our
tickets via
Mumbai (then
Bombay) and
Bangalore.
My mother
applied for a
fortnight’s
leave and I too
packed my
suitcase. On the
day before the
journey, my
daughter
suddenly fell
ill. So, I was
dropped, and my
sister, who had
just given her
Bachelor of
Sciences final
exams, seemed
the perfect
person to
accompany my
mother as the
proxy nurse on
her last
journey, as it
turned out to
be. I cried a
lot and handed
over my suitcase
to my younger
sister. Maybe it
was still not
time for me to
have Swami’s
darshan.
“Mothers
troubles will be
over soon” -
Swami
When they
reached Mumbai,
somebody told
them that Baba
was in
Bangalore. So,
after much
inconvenience,
my mother along
with my father
and sister
reached Baba’s
ashram in
Whitefield,
Bangalore, only
to be told that
Swami had left
for Puttaparthi.
They traveled
again, with my
mother in that
precarious
condition,
praying all the
while for
Swami’s
darshan to
her before
anything serious
happened to her.
Once in
Puttaparthi,
they received
help from other
devotees and the
very presence of
Swami filled
them with a new
life. They had
darshan
and received
Swami’s
blessings twice
every day and
sometimes even
thrice! Well,
‘they’ here
refers to only
my mother and
sister; my
father, being a
non-believer,
strolled away
outside the
ashram to
have his fill of
smoking.
|
After
this,
Swami
patted
my
father
on the
shoulder
and gave
him
Vibhuti.
My
father,
given
his
attitude
about
such
things,
he first
looked
suspiciously
at the
Vbhuti
in his
palm and
then at
the long
sleeve
of
Swami’s
robe.
Now,
Swami’s
eyebrow
rose and
giving
him a
quizzical
smile,
He
ordered,
“Mukherjee,
phenk
do”
(Mukherjee,
throw it
away).
My
father
threw
the
Vibhuti,
which
immediately
vanished.
Now,
Swami
rolled
His
right
sleeve
up, much
above
His
elbow,
raised
His hand
and then
materialized
Vibhuti.
He gave
it to my
mother,
sister,
and
father
too, and
then
lovingly
said,
“Prasadam
hai, kha
lo”
(It is
prasad,
eat it).
My
father
gave a
sheepish
smile
and
swallowed
it.
|
On Guru Poornima
day, Swami
called them for
an interview,
but my father
was nowhere to
be seen. Swami
sent someone
saying that
Mukherjee must
be having a
smoke outside.
Father was
literally made
to throw away
his cigarette
and rushed to
the interview
room.
Once he was
inside, Swami
told them many
things about
their past, the
young
‘revolutionary’
days of my
father and even
his school days!
Needless to say,
everyone was
awestruck.
Swami chided my
father for
bringing my
mother to Him so
late, even after
His personal
visit to their
house! My father
said that he did
not believe it
was Him as he
could not see
His face. Swami
then pointing to
my mother,
clarified that
He had indeed
gone to Kota on
that summer
night and talked
to my mother for
a long time and
then returned,
walking past his
cot.
The next moment,
Swami laughed
and said,
“Face nahin
dikha kyonki
believe nahin
karta. Amma Ko
poocho main
udhar aaya tha
na!
(You didn’t see
my face because
you didn’t
believe. Ask
mother. Am I not
correct?)”
Next, He asked
my sister what
she wanted. She
had carried
three slips with
her which
contained her
requests. She
now quietly
handed over
those to Swami.
Bhagavan looked
at the slips and
then with a
mischievous
smile looked at
her. Opening the
first slip He
said,
“Amma Ka
takleef jaldi
dur hojayega.”
(Your mother
will be relieved
of her troubles
soon). Reading
the second slip
He kept His hand
on my sister’s
head and said
“Parva nahi,
tum to already
second division
se pass ho gaya.
Jao, be happy.”
(No problem. You
have already
cleared second
division. Go, be
happy).
When Swami read
the third slip,
He turned to my
mother and held
her hand in His
hands and then
slowly reassured
her saying,
“Amma, fikar
nahin karna,
iska shadi usi
ladka se hoga
jisko tum pasand
kiya hai. Good
boy!”
(Mother, do not
worry. She will
marry the boy
that you have
approved. He is
a good boy!).
After this,
Swami patted my
father on the
shoulder and
gave him
Vibhuti. My
father, given
his attitude
about such
things, he first
looked
suspiciously at
the Vbhuti in
his palm and
then at the long
sleeve of
Swami’s robe.
Now, Swami’s
eyebrow rose and
giving him a
quizzical smile,
He ordered,
“Mukherjee,
phenk do”
(Mukherjee,
throw it away).
My father threw
the Vibhuti,
which
immediately
vanished. Now,
Swami rolled His
right sleeve up,
much above His
elbow, raised
His hand and
then
materialized
Vibhuti. He
gave it to my
mother, sister,
and father too,
and then
lovingly said,
“Prasadam
hai, kha lo”
(It is
prasad, eat
it). My father
gave a sheepish
smile and
swallowed it.
After blessing
them profusely,
Swami told my
father to take
my mother back
to Kota the next
morning. Mother
cried and
touched Swami’s
lotus feet. To
her Swami said,
“Jao Amma,
takleef bahut
jaldi dur ho
jayega. Sab
theek ho jayega"
(Go mother, your
troubles will
solved very
soon. Everything
will be okay).
She asked, “Baba
bachchon Ka
Kya hoga?”(Baba,
what will happen
to the
children?) He
said,
“Don’t worry
Amma, Swami
sabko dekhega”
(Swami will take
care of
everybody).
Swami gave
Vibhuti to
my sister and
instructed her
to mix it with
water and give
it to my mother
whenever she
wanted
something. With
moist eyes and a
heavy heart they
left
Puttaparthi.
Mother’s
Blissful Final
Journey
After reaching
Bombay, they
phoned us as
they had missed
the connecting
train. Instead
of reaching Kota
on July 31, they
said that they
will now be
reaching only on
the morning of
August 1. I was
terribly
depressed and
disappointed. I
could hardly
sleep, but when
I did I dreamt
of my mother
being taken out
of the train
compartment on a
wheel chair,
fully covered
with garlands.
It was shocking.
In my heart of
hearts I knew it
was a message to
prepare one for
the inevitable.
I kept crying
and praying.
|
When
three of
us did
salutations,
Mr.
Swami
asked
her to
open her
mouth
and held
the same
flower
in his
palm
over her
open
mouth. I
could
see
something
dripping
from his
fingers.
As I had
placed
that
rose in
the
garland,
I
wondered
what
that
fluid
was, and
from
where
did it
come
from?
Before I
could
ask
anything,
Mr.
Swami
had
extended
that
rose
towards
me. I
automatically
cupped
my
hands,
collected
the
golden
syrup
and
consumed
it. What
fragrance!
Truly,
heavenly
taste! I
had
never
tasted
anything
even
remotely
resembling
this.
|
I had been
waiting eagerly
for my mother to
come home, not
only because she
was sick and
away from home,
and I was so
eager to know
all that had
happened at
Puttaparthi, but
also because
something had
happened in Kota
about which I
wanted to share
with her.
A Guru Poornima
special
bhajan had
been organized
by the devotees
and we were
invited to come
a little early
before the
bhajans
commenced to
help in the
various chores.
I was given the
task of making
the big white
garland for
Swami’s main
photo. It had a
big red rose in
the middle
making it quite
heavy.
During the
bhajan,
when we were
singing with
great fervor and
devotion,
suddenly the
main garland
started surging
and then broke
at the middle!
The big red rose
dropped down
behind the lamp.
And all the
while, the
bhajans
continued and
finished with
the usual
arati.
For me, the
uninitiated,
this was
something
unique. I took
the prasadam
and waited
quietly for
everyone else to
leave so that I
could pick that
rose and take it
home. When
everybody,
except one old
devotee, Mr.
Swami, had left,
the owner of the
house who was
also the
organizer of the
bhajan
session, Dr.
Banerji, called
me to the altar.
As I was looking
for the rose
behind the lamp,
Mr. Swami picked
it up and
touched it to
his forehead. I
was very
disappointed
that my rose had
gone! He called
my husband and
asked me to
bring my
daughter, who
was sleeping in
another room.
When three of us
did salutations,
Mr. Swami asked
her to open her
mouth and held
the same flower
in his palm over
her open mouth.
I could see
something
dripping from
his fingers. As
I had placed
that rose in the
garland, I
wondered what
that fluid was,
and from where
did it come
from? Before I
could ask
anything, Mr.
Swami had
extended that
rose towards me.
I automatically
cupped my hands,
collected the
golden syrup and
consumed it.
What fragrance!
Truly, heavenly
taste! I had
never tasted
anything even
remotely
resembling this.
|
|
Mrs.
Neeta
Banerjee's
mother
|
|
Ms. Banerjee
told me that
this was Baba’s
way of accepting
our prayers.
This is His
blessing. She
also told me
that at that
time my mother
must have been
praying to Baba
for us and that
probably He had
accepted her
prayers too! Mr.
Swami then told
my husband that
we were indeed
very fortunate
as Baba had
taken us into
His fold. That
was the Guru
Poornima of
1972!
I wanted to
share this news
with my mother
and sister, and
wanted to know
from them
everything that
had happened in
Puttaparthi as
early as I
could. Four days
had already
passed since
Guru Poornima
day, and I was
really waiting
for the moment
when I would
hear from my
mother of her
experience of
meeting Swami.
But Baba had
planned
something else
for me. I was
not destined to
hear anything
from my mother…
In Bombay, at
about 9.45 a.m.,
my mother asked
for water with
Swami’s
Vibhuti.
She also asked
my sister to
open the
suitcase. She
wanted to wear
her ring with
Swami’s photo on
it. My sister
tried to reason
out with her
that in an hour
and a half they
would be
reaching Kota,
and mother could
then gift all
the things they
had bought such
as books, rings,
and Vibhuti
to everybody,
and then wear
her own ring
too. However,
mother insisted
to wear her ring
right then.
Very reluctantly
my sister opened
the suitcase and
took out all the
packets and
tried the rings
one by one on
her finger. When
mother got a
ring, which was
a perfect fit on
her finger, she
wore it and
smiled. Then,
she took a sip
of Vibhuti
water and looked
far away from
the window of
the running
train. Restful,
smiling, and
with a faraway
look in her
eyes, she
breathed her
last in the
running train at
10.00 a.m.
On the morning
of August 1, my
husband received
a phone call
from his office,
and he had to
leave urgently
on some official
work. He assured
me that he’ll
send the office
car at 10.00
a.m. to fetch
me. I was
supposed to go
to the station
to receive my
mother. As I was
offering my
pranams to
Swami, my
husband came
quietly and
stood behind me
silently. When I
turned around,
he revealed to
me, “It’s all
over! I am
coming with you
to the station.”
All the other
devotees who
wanted to come
to meet her were
stopped by
Swami, for on
that day, for
the first time
in Kota, a
bandh
(strike) was
declared.
Swami’s
Trial by Fire
I was shocked,
to say the
least. My whole
world crumbled
around me. My
mother, who was
my role model,
inspiration,
guide and guru
was no more! I
was dying to
hear from her
about her
cherished last
desire which
Baba had
fulfilled, but
she died without
saying a word! I
was shaken, my
faith was
disturbed.
Father had, in
brief, told me
the previous
evening that
Baba had blessed
her and she was
extremely calm
and peaceful.
But then what
changed so
suddenly?
|
I was
shocked,
to say
the
least.
My whole
world
crumbled
around
me. My
mother,
who was
my role
model,
inspiration,
guide
and guru
was no
more! I
was
dying to
hear
from her
about
her
cherished
last
desire
which
Baba had
fulfilled,
but she
died
without
saying a
word! I
was
shaken,
my faith
was
disturbed.
Father
had, in
brief,
told me
the
previous
evening
that
Baba had
blessed
her and
she was
extremely
calm and
peaceful.
But then
what
changed
so
suddenly? |
On the way to
the station our
family doctor
joined us in his
car. A police
jeep and the
pick-up van, in
which mother had
gone to the far
flung villages
hundreds of
times,
accompanied the
two cars. The
driver cried so
much that our
doctor had to
brief him and me
not to cry at
the station as
my mother was
being brought
out as a serious
patient.
By Swami’s
grace, there was
no problem with
railways or the
police, and we
came home
safely. Before
we reached home,
hundreds of
people had
gathered to have
her last
darshan.
That was the end
of an era!
My sister was
inconsolable.
She kept
questioning
Swami all the
time and accused
Him of not
caring for her.
We all know that
Baba puts us
through an
Agni Pariksha
(trial by fire)
before accepting
us as devotees.
Our pariksha
(test) had just
begun.
Too many things
were happening
at that time,
but let me
narrate only
about the three
promises made by
Baba.
Swami
Keeps His
Promise
Baba had said
that my mother’s
takleef
(troubles) will
be over – my
mother was now
dead.
My sister was
supposed to have
passed Bachelors
in Science in
second division,
but she failed
in physics and
when she
appeared for the
supplementary
exams, she
failed again!
During those
days, if one
failed in the
supplementary
exams too, one
had to go back
to the first
year again. A
girl who had
just lost her
mother could not
have passed that
exam, but why
did Baba tell
her that she had
already passed
B.Sc.?
Coming to the
third slip, Baba
had assured my
mother that her
daughter will
marry the boy
whom she had
chosen for her.
Now who will
tell us, who
that boy was?
I was not able
to bear my
younger sister’s
heart-wrenching
cries and her
pointed
questions,
because I had no
answers for
them. When the
form was brought
for her to fill,
she declared
that she would
rather die than
going back to
the first year
class; she had
almost
threatened us.
I folded the
form, kept it at
Swami’s feet and
offered an
ultimatum,
“Baba, if my
sister dies. I
will also leave
this body and
then people are
not going to
have faith in
You. This is not
our, but Your
pariskha
(test)! You have
to prove
Yourself.” I
closed the door
of the altar. I
did no puja,
no lighting of
lamps or
offering any
prasadam.
All I did was to
cry and pray.
|
My own
way of
life was
against
everything
that
Baba
teaches
(laughs).
I was
breaking
every
one of
Baba’s
rules.
But that
is how
Baba
works!
It’s not
so much
from
trying
to
suppress
and
change
the
‘bad’ in
you,
it’s
more
falling
so
deeply
in love
with the
‘good’
that
eventually
the
‘bad’
disappears.
And that
is what
the
transformation
is - the
‘good’,
the
‘right’
takes
over
more and
more of
your
life.
Till all
of a
sudden
you
realise
that
‘darkness’
has no
more
power on
you. |
One afternoon
during these
days, the local
postman
delivered a
registered
letter from the
University of
Rajasthan. It
was a regret
letter from the
Registrar of the
University
apologizing for
the mistake they
had made, which
had caused so
much anguish and
heartburn to my
sister.
Along with the
letter was the
new mark sheet
in which my
sister had
secured 58%
marks in the
original B.Sc.
final
examination. We
couldn’t believe
our eyes! It was
not a dream. It
was… a miracle!
The altar was
now opened,
cleaned and
decorated;
apologies and
prayers were
offered. My
sister joined
Masters in
Sciences.
A couple of
months later a
young and
handsome boy
came to my
house. He
offered his
condolences and
said that he had
gone home on a
long leave and
hence, could not
have my mother’s
last darshan.
He told me that
on a particular
night, after the
Bengali
Community’s
Saraswati Puja,
my mother had
invited him for
dinner and while
he was eating
she had enquired
about his
family, job,
caste, and so
on.
He then
hesitatingly
told me that he
liked my sister
very much. He
also thought
that my mother
approved of him.
Since my father
was out of
station, he
requested me to
talk to father
and get back to
him. He also
told me that he
knew my husband
as he was also
working in the
same
organization.
This was Swami’s
reply to the
third slip. Now
we had only one
question, which
had the simplest
answer - in
death, my mother
was freed from
her takleef
(troubles).
The Home
Coming
So much has
happened in the
last 36 years,
25 of which have
gone in yearning
and pining for
Swami. We tried
to come to
Puttaparthi so
many times, but
it didn’t
materialize.
Since my planned
first visit,
which got
abruptly
cancelled and my
sister went in
my place, I was,
in my heart of
hearts, cross
with Swami.
Sometimes I used
to cry and tell
Him, I won’t
come till you
call me
Yourself.
One day, out of
the blue, my
friend called me
to ask whether I
was interested
in going to
Puttaparthi as a
Sevadal. I had
no inkling on
the
qualification of
a Sevadal, but I
immediately
accepted.
In 1997, which
was my first
visit, whatever
I asked for was
granted
immediately. He
heard my prayers
even though I
was serving
kilometers away
in the Dietary
Department of
the Super
Specialty
Hospital.
When I returned
Delhi, I was
worried about a
home, as my
husband was
about to retire
in the very next
month. Owning a
house on your
own land is not
an easy affair
in Delhi, it
being the
capital city of
India, but Swami
made it
possible. When
our house was
built, I wrote a
letter to Swami
and prayed,
“Swami, please
always be with
us in
‘Prasanthi’.”
We had named our
house thus, and
felt Swami’s
presence there
always. Baba
seemed to say, “Tathastu
(so be it)!” But
with a little
modification -
Prasanthi became
Prasanthi
Nilayam. Within
the next three
years we moved
ourselves lock,
stock and barrel
to His physical
presence in
Puttaparthi.
Baba had
promised my
dying mother
that He will
look after us.
He is doing just
that!